Tag Archives: Hotep

WHY MELANIN ISN’T ENOUGH FOR BLACK MEN: THE STEVIE STEVE SYNOPSIS

Over this Easter weekend, a Black man named Stevie Stephens (Stevie Steve on Facebook) killed an innocent Black man randomly, in cold blood, on Facebook live.

While most people were horrified at the viral video and sharing subsequent videos of him explaining WHY he did what he did and what he did (sadly), most immediately chalked it up to mental illness.

Using mental illness, especially in this case, as an excuse for the murder of an innocent civilian is thee most cowardly excuse ever created.

HERE’S WHY:

The most interesting thing about Steve Steve’s commentary is that he blamed a black woman for his behavior. He even named her, (Jody Lane) and asked his victim to name her before firing the trigger.

This is the same black woman who subsequently released a statement following the incident saying he is a “nice guy” and “good to her children”. Read it Below:

“We had been in a relationship for several years. I am sorry that all of this has happened. My heart & prayers goes out to the family members of the victim(s). Steve really is a nice guy… he is generous with everyone he knows. He was kind and loving to me and my children. This is a very difficult time for me and my family Please respect our privacy at this time.”

So what happened? What caused this unimaginable tragedy.

Definitely NOT mental illness.

He left clues in his videos that he was seeking help. He stated that he talked to his mother who didn’t help. He stated he talked to other people who didn’t help and that he snapped. He wanted them to call him. He was aware of his action and consequence.

He was fully aware that what he was doing was some “sucker shit”. He said that multiple times. He even flashed his work badge. He was also a coward, shown by the fact that he picked a man who was elderly and couldn’t put up a real fight. He wasn’t really about that serial killer life.

He was fully aware and cognizant of what he was doing and what he wanted to do. He knew he wanted to be a random person. He wanted the world to know – via Facebook – who pushed him to do it. This is premeditated murder.


THE BLACK MALE MELANIN EXCUSE:

If you ask a “conscious” black male about blackness, they will immediately rattle off historical and current accounts of black greatness.

They will tell you how much melanin is a gram, how we are the original man, lived righteously as Kings and Queens, are Gods and goddesses and detail the horrors of slavery.

They will tell you how magical we are due to our high concentration of melanin, how we have overcome the slave trade and how physically and superior we are to other races.

Now, I’m not saying none of these things are factual. In fact most of what I recounted is right and exact (shout out to Yada). But, these things are often seen as enough to qualify our individual CHARACTER and PRINCIPLES.

 

Divinity is not a birthright my brother. It has to be SINCERELY CULTIVATED and REFINED consistently.

You can’t dress divinity up in a dashiki or business suit. You can’t wear a head wrap and lock your hair to achieve it. You cant vegan diet and read books to get it. You can’t go to a temple, church, mosque or shrine to get it.

It MUST come from WITHIN. It takes HARD WORK and DISCIPLINE. Men must do more of this. We gotta get our inner shit together. RBG ain’t enough.


THE FLIP SIDE:

It’s easy to say: “Well he’s an adult. He should know how to cope as a grown ass man”.

But…… What if he’s never been able to talk to anyone about his problems?
What if how he’s coped with pressures since he was a teenager has been weed/cocaine/lean/molly/liquor etc?  Who teaches black men HOW to cope??

He did “snap” but not because he was crazy. He snapped because no one was there to help him with his stress. No one wanted to listen to his problems.

He seemed to be tired of being a “nice guy” as he said. He seemed to be tired of having to mask his emotions. He always felt like he was getting “blown off”.

Or as Kendrick Lamar so eloquently put it on the song “Feel” from his recently released album DAMN:
“Ain’t nobody praying for me”.

Black men don’t really have support groups. We don’t talk with our friends about our problems the same way women do. We are taught and socialized to be strong, tough, show no love, be aggressive and never EVER tell someone your feelings.

God forbid we tell someone we are seeing a psychiatrist. The stigma of being CRAZY gets put on you and friends and family start looking at you different.

You get called a bitch or sucker if your emotional or sensitive. You are isolated and left to be strong and figure it out on your own.

What usually happens is Black men “snap” into rampant drug abuse to cope. They become more misogynistic. They become depressed. They show less empathy and conscience and become self-centered and egotistical. They become unstable. They no longer love themselves so how can they properly love another. They become abusive. They in essence self destruct.

They snap cause ain’t nobody praying for them. Sadly, they may not know how to pray for themselves.

THE LESSON IN THE TRAGEDY:

Do I think someone talking to him would have stopped him? Would him going to a church that Sunday, even if he’s not religious, just to dance and hear the choir have stopped him?
Psychiatry? A good friend who could hear him out WITHOUT JUDGEMENT and give him some advice? Maybe a meditation teacher? Some yoga? Took some time to walk with him in nature? Gave him some coping mechanisms? Or just told him “I can relate?”

Maybe. Maybe not. I have no idea.
However, I do know we, the black community, need a change and fast.

Suicide is the third leading cause of death among black males ages 15-24, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Statistics say that Black adult men committing suicide has dropped but the rate amongst black boys has DOUBLED since the 1990’s.

This means the next generation of black men are dying before they are adults and willingly.

Call a black man or boy and show him some concern. Listen to him. Allow him to be vulnerable around you.
Don’t just tell him to pray. Show him how to cope with life’s pressures. Stay in tune with your son’s. Tell the men in your family you love them. Help them CULTIVATE and REFINE their character. Show him now to nurture his spirit if you know how. Be a good friend.
Let a man cry. Tell him it’s ok and it will be ok. Let him know strength IS in asking for help when you need it.

I’m not saying this would have stopped this tragedy, but maybe, just maybe it would have helped Stevie cope with his own emotions better.


DON’T BLAME BLACK WOMEN.   BECOME BETTER.

Oh…To you men on social media blaming black women. Please smack the shit out of yourself. It’s not Joy Lane’s fault or black women’s burden to carry for this individuals maliscious act of savagery.

The one thing all humans, male and female, need to learn and practice is self accountability. No one can REALLY make you do anything you don’t really want to do.

We can be SELF ACCOUNTABLE & SEEK HELP.  We can ALSO GIVE HELP.  Both are ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY for individual growth.

We need to learn to love how to love ourselves in a world where its taught that love can be bought sold and filtered through selfies, likes and hearts and learn to show empathy for others. We need to work on the spiritual and inner parts of ourselves and start shedding the masks of being “strong” when we are hurt depressed and weak.

Seek help and be a person WILLING to help. Go within. Be a better human for the world.

FEEL.

(Sidebar: Yes, conspiracy guy. This could all be a fake ritual designed to tap into the pain body of Black America on the day of Easter and further keep us in trauma and in the “sunken place”. He was driving with a cell phone which pings back and forth to cell towers in a car. Also the recent admission that he went to Philadelphia means he had to go through a toll booth of some sort. But..who knows?)

Peace, Power and Prosperity,

Dating While #Woke – What to look out for

Since the deaths of Trayvon Martin, Tamir Rice, Freddy Gray and Michael Brown, many black men and women are awakening to the uniqueness of their experience here in America and the whole African diaspora.
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This is causing them to seek the answers to the why, when and how of things not only in America , but also those of ancestral past . They want to recreate the culture their ancestors lived and duplicate its customs.
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They want to worship their ancient spiritual gods and goddesses. They want to dress like their ancestors. They want to eat like them.
They want to date others that are like-minded and on a similar path.
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This is the path into the black conscious community dating pool.  Looking for a mate to share your path and newfound awareness.
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However, like any community, there are those who are sincere and those who are faking and fronting. Egomaniacs. Cowards.  Wolves in sheep’s clothing. The personification of the Pharisees of Biblical lore.  
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Black Women, more than any of us, have to be especially guarded when going in the black conscious community.
Wolves in sheep’s clothing that have beautiful words of wisdom and enlightenment to speak and are dressed in Afrocentric  garments to attract and then set a trap for you.  Some want to exploit you sexually, financially and emotionally with no regard for you, your children or well-being.
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These are not the sincere seekers in the conscious community but what is now being called Hotep ni**as.
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Not to be confused with this legend:
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For those women who are new in the community,  My friend Leah Bayaka has a guide for you. I added a little here and there but these are her thoughts and words from her years of experience dealing with men in the community: 
 
LEAH BAYAKA

Things I wish a more experienced Sistah had told me when I was in my 20s.

This good word for the day is spoken from over 20 years of experience, as I am now a woman of a certain age……

But you are: Eager, young, willing to please, fired up to support the ‘movement’ and meet potential mates online or at conscious crew gatherings.

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Here are the two different profiles for men in the conscious community:

The Conscious Con-Artist Profile:

*No verifiable income

*Can recite every biblical verse that supports European Patriarchy and feels that a real man doesn’t need a woman’s advice.

 

*A visionary who sounds like he has a plan to save the world.

*A proponent of polygamy so that he can brag to his card carrying crew members about the number of wives and unkempt youths he has and tells you he is supporting his 1st and 2nd wife who you’ve never spoken with to verify. 

*Discourages any questioning of his income or ability to care of you and possible children.

*Discourages any questioning of his master plan to “nation build”.

*A master of emotional manipulation, citing all the advantages black women have had all of these years.

*Always spotlighting the wrongs and inequities black people face while rarely offering , discussing or participating in concrete reality based solutions.

 

*Hates all Black American women, except you (so long as you are towing the party line) and venerates all women from South America or Africa…as long as they are fully dressed, dark-skinned and have natural hair.

*Spends a lot of time in the FB inboxes/DM’s of sistahs and preaching via his status updates.

*Spends a lot of time arguing and cursing out women on social media about his patriarchal status updates and views.

*Hates his mother but calls all other Black women Earths and Queens.

*lacks a good sense of humour and doesn’t know how to let loose and have fun.

*Discusses black issues and his melanin power 24/7 even though it may be in an inappropriate setting.

*Blames his poor lovemaking skills on black women being too demanding in bed or thinks just having “good dick” is enough.

*Doesn’t nurture and financially support his own children.

*disrespecting other women while in your company.

*Won’t deal with you fully until you fulfill x,y and z citing his own unproven adherence to said guidelines for worthiness.

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The Possible, Might Could Consider, Awakened Man Profile:

*Actually has income through his own hustles or is working a day/night job while also pushing his side entrepreneurial hustle


* A proponent  of polygamy and has deeply considered the implications and chosen not to take on additional until he is satisfied he can support them all FINANCIALLY AS WELL AS EMOTIONALLY.

*Is supporting his current wife or wives and welcomes to you query them about this fact.

* Asks that his wife choose you first.

*Encourages your checking his businesses, job, side hustles, friends and family (wives)

*Encourages your input on the master plan and encourages you to pursue whatever hustle that fits your talents or supports your choice not to pursue outside hustle, but to raise children and support the family household in other, yet very important ways. 

*Realizes that the first nation to build is his family and once that foundation is solid, it will better prepare him to build anything outside of it.


*Emotionally mature and focused on his male runnings and goals; thereby having less time to sit on FB, Instagram or Twitter collecting inbox chicks.

*Seeks a woman’s advice knowing that she has a sixth sense and is a creator and nurturer by nature.

*Innerstands the cultural ills and trauma that face both Black American men AND women and chooses to highlight and create paths for black health, success, wellness and wealth.

*Knows how to enjoy life, let loose, be silly at times, plan dates and do things for you to let you know you are appreciated.

*Studies lovemaking and foreplay as an art and finds different ways on how to pleasure you sexually through study, diet, fitness and discipline.

*Appreciates the work and sacrifices his mother (and hopefully father) made to raise him.

*Proven track record of taking care of his children and other important responsibilities.

*Honors and treat other women well in his everyday life.


*Doesn’t just TALK BUT WALKS the life he preaches.

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Prayerfully some young sistah somewhere who is being lured will read this, slow down, and take heed. 

There is no rush in these matters… get out of your ‘feelings’ for him and do what’s right for yourself, future youth and future plans.

Much Love,

Leah Bayaka

 

 

You can find her at www.leahbayaka.com doing black girl magic and other phenomenal things.

 

Peace, Power & Prosperity…

Superman vs Lois Lane: The Rocky Relationship between Black Men and Black Women. Part 1

Many people will be rushing into the theaters to see fictional white men in tights battle each other for superhero supremacy in the DC comic book universe.

I will be watching as well but that’s not the point of this article. The point of this article is to show that Black men are fighting instead of SUPPORTING and LISTENING to their greatest ally: The Strong Black woman.

 

When we go into the movie theater we are bound to, at some point in the film, see Superman rescue Lois Lane.  Saving Lois is something that is consistent when you watch any Superman film past or present.

Depending on your level of perception, you could say it’s his DUTY. He MUST protect Lois Lane even if it means his own demise.

When you watch the Lois Lane character development over the years, you will notice that Lois usually has a bit of an attitude.

She is resourceful and a go getter. She talks sh*t with the best of them. She is about her business and is pretty fiery and aggressive. She will fearlessly tell a powerful supervillain to kiss her ass.

She is dare I say. ..a lil hood? Has a Black Woman’s attitude of strength and survival no matter the odds?

She is not humble, meek, dainty or reserved. She doesn’t seem like a homebody who wants to just breed children and cater to Clark Kent. She does not wait for Superman to save her and does not knowingly put herself in positions to be saved. She has her own career, makes her own money and is goal oriented and prideful. She is self aware and takes a back seat to no one. She is powerful and formidable on her own. She dates and sleeps with who she wants too,

Most importantly, when Clark Kent or Superman are not strong, she is there to REASSURE HIM of his power, strength, intelligence and bravery. She aids him with wisdom, nurture and love.

When she initially meets Clark Kent she sees him as a weak farm boy because he seems too timid, passive and unorganized. Yet she still helps him navigate metropolis after coming from Smallville, Kansas.
She LIKES Clark Kent but LOVES Superman for his demonstrative strength, power, courage and risk taking ability.

She wants her man to be a Superman in the universe as much as possible.

Lois Lane, based on the characteristics described, is a strong awakened Black Woman in whiteface.

The strong black woman who is awakened or is “conscious” fits all these Lois Lane attributes. Even the woman who has no knowledge of her culture but strives to do right by her man fits this bill.

BUT IS THE BLACKMAN HER SUPERMAN?

As discussed earlier, Superman’s duty is to protect and rescue Lois Lane. Even after he fights Lex Luthor or any other Super Villain anywhere in the galaxy, his PRIMARY purpose is to make sure Lois Lane is safe and sound.

He would let anyone else die before he let’s Lois Lane gets harmed.

Black men, since the onset of the crack epidemic, have not protected black women.  I’m sure seeing the black family doing deplorable things with the goal of getting high has damaged our view of each other. However, with the crack era slowly fading away, the view on black women is almost the same as in the 1980’s and 90’s.

 

Let’s be honest. We call them Thots, Hoes, Chickenheads and bitches in our popular music and day to day conversation. We make music videos that show them as expendable. We value their beauty and bodies but not their worth, wisdom and opinions.

Let’s not forget the cultural “conscious” man  who views women as moons, earth’s but NEVER as the universe itself.

Dr. Umar Johnson, who is an intelligent orator that has gained popularity.  He,  like most good prosperity preachers, called a woman he was sleeping with a “maggot in life” and had this to say about black women’s hair choices in his hustlers….never being built…i mean…FDMG Academy:

“Unnatural hair will not be accepted on the FDMG campus. All Queens in training (K-12) must adhere to this rule. First infractions will result in a $500 fine to the parent or legal guardian. Your child will be expelled from school upon their second infraction. Unnatural hair includes perm, wig, weave, european hair colors, extensions, sew-ins, straightening comb, etc……” (Excerpt from 2016 Anna Douglass & Amy Garvey RBG Leadership Academy Parent & Princess  meeting)”

So now a woman’s hair choice is attacked by her “Superman” as well?  I mean look at what dude is making himself out to be:
SMH. 

 

I’ve heard popular “Black Power” posers…i mean “teachers” like Sara Suten Seti call a black woman a bitch simply for questioning him. Start at the 00:08:30 mark:

Then he says the Black Woman is God?? HUH??

Also, how many black women do you see on the popular (money making out the ass) lecture circuit delivering keynote addresses?  I do, however see them serving  serving food and vending, with “¾ of cloth” on of course.

Black men have hyper sexulazied a woman’s body to the point that if she shows some skin she gets negatively labeled, abrasively cat called and viewed as Babylonian harlot.  Even though indigenous African cultures used nudity in ritual and everyday life, most men with this cultural “conscious” knowledge still expect women to be fully clothed and associate that with being a respectful and honorable women.

After all, “Supermen” can’t control their own lust nowadays. Ain’t that right “King”?

Black men are becoming increasingly more violent, disrespectful and damaging to the black woman.  Perhaps because they, Black men are acting more like women themselves than SuperMAN!  Superman understands the difference between the sexes and does not respond with emotional pettiness towards women.  Neither does Superman ignore women but prioritizes and focuses on his role as protector, provider and lover.

Also, that confusion created by a man adopting  “feminine characteristics” is not only unnatural, but is a poor excuse for not getting jobs or providing financially for their women and children. Some even use the “white man/racism holding me down” as an excuse like women aren’t facing the same issues.

Not Superman like.

I’ve heard Black men talk so negatively about a Black Woman’s aggressive attitude (Lois lane has an attitude) to the point of calling Black Women all sorts of bitches and  animals. Yet, in the same breath Black men will call themselves Kings and Gods.

Black men on popular “reality” shows treat black women horribly. Even though these shows are scripted the storyline perpetuates the behavior of black women being mistreated by black men.  Repetition breeds memory and the more these shows are viewed by impressionable young male minds the more this behavior towards women will be emulated.

Black male fathers are blaming single black mothers for their sons becoming involved in street life,  gang activity and having effeminate ways.   These same “fathers” who should be the “Superman” of the community are cowards, mostly incarcerated, lack responsibility or are themselves effeminate.  Who could ignore that the women have had to play BOTH mommy and daddy and that UNBALANCE  has created a tide of low-life behavior.

 

Fortunately the Black women, our Lois Lane’s, still aim to take the Black man from the Clark Kent stage to Superman level.  Most still know that the Black man are “giants” and are willing to love and nurture their man in modern metropolis.

Black men we have to do better. Read this  Black men and get  ready because Part 2 will explain & decode how Black men are truly Supermen and how we can rescue our Black Lois Lane’s before it’s too late.